Change is in the air...

     Spring is just around the corner, the boys of summer have returned to the desert for spring training, "March Madness" is upon us once again...(Hey, Geek, are we having a pool this year or has Get Back Loretta hung up her hoop shoes), and the Arizona Kid is itching for a change...(the last time I got this itch I moved across the country).  The bad place I was in when we last visited has been replaced by a quest for new adventures.  While I appreciate the confidence that my bosses have shown in me to promote me and move me into the office, I find that it has taken away the reason I got into this business in the first place...to meet people and work the events themselves.  Several returning clients who met me originally as a guard at their events were glad to see me but unhappy that I wasn't actually "working" the event.  I miss the meet and greets at the entrance, getting to know the vendors, and interacting more personally with the guards.  I actually miss being outside patrolling the Ostrich Festival or the Salsa Challenge and long for another go at Country Thunder.

     My "hobby" has come full circle into a job, and I didn't move 2500 miles to get another job.  I need to work, but I need to do something that I enjoy and I want to do it on my schedule.  When I was a starving guard, I had the ability to set my own schedule and work when I wanted to.  Now, my schedule is set and my days off are few and with spring just 2 weeks away, I want to travel and play golf and resume the life I planned when I came out here in the first place.  You guys don't want to read about my job...(you all have one of those already), you want to read about my adventures, my travels, my romantic trysts...(okay, maybe not those), but you know what I mean.  And I, don't want to fill my blogs with job stories, either.  I want to regale you with stories of fulfilling my golf bucket list, of places I visited and the people I met, of reconnecting with family all over this country, of crazy odd jobs I grab for "greens fees".   That was plan from the beginning and I apologize for "falling off the wagon" and repeating past mistakes.  I have relapsed into the addiction that fed all my other addictions.  Letting myself get into a bad situation at work caused me to become angry. Rather than dealing with that anger and changing the situation, I drank and drugged myself to dull the pain.  Finally woke up (in jail) and started to embrace change and with each new change...(after the ULTIMATE change of getting sober), I became stronger and better.  But old habits die hard (or not at all) and here I am in that bad situation and angry at myself.  But have no fear...no drinking or drugging will happen here (hey, I rhymed!). 

     There are many ways to change and many degrees of change.  I am blessed (cursed?) in the fact that I only need to worry about myself at this time (although that is a full time job in itself) and my possibilities are limitless (although joining a circus is NOT one of them...clowns make me uncomfortable).  But I truly believe my tenure with my present job has run its course.  I am researching many potential avenues by which to continue travelling through life and of course you will be second (I will be the first) to know when and what will become of me.  The possibilities are endless... "Tis a far, far better thing I do, then I have ever done before" (A Tale of Two Cities, Charles Dickens)